Drunk but not in love....

I like to enjoy a nice glass of wine like the next person, (not an alcoholic but my friends might have another thing to say about that. lol) It was a typical, Thursday night and I was home watching Sex and the City with a bottle of red wine. Drinking away and comparing my love life with the characters on the show:  Carrie, Samantha, Miranda, and Charlotte; I guess you can say it was a Girls' Night. By 10PM, I was half way into the bottle and fully into my emotions. Yes, I'm one of those emotional drunks. I turned off my television and opted to listen to some music because I was in the mood to dance, as I turned up my speakers the Beyonce song "Drunk in Love" came on and (oh let me tell you) I began to dance and sing! Better than Beyonce I might add, (lol) but thank goodness I was by myself. As I was giving it all I got: fully intoxicated with my pajamas on and a glass of red wine in my left hand I began thinking "Damn, I'm drunk but I'm not in love." 

I was followed by a really awkward pause, and in a flash I began thinking about every single guy that hurt me, cheated on me, played me, dated me, loved me, hated me and I started to laugh, I never laughed so hard in my life (again thank goodness I was by myself). I laughed because with every guy I thought it was the end, I thought I would never be the same, I would be this cold-hearted woman that would never be happy with each heart break. At that moment with my glass of wine and Beyonce singing in the background, I realized there wasn't a guy that was going to come into my life and break my heart, at that moment I wasn't going to be cheated on, hurt, played, hated, or loved. I was just drunk, happy and hapy to be single. Once I came back to reality, I began singing "Drunk but not in loveeee, I be all night oooo...." 

It so funny how sometimes we feel like we need to be in a relationship to be happy or loved but it's the complete opposite, if we can't be happy or love ourself, how can we expect someone to do the same for us? It would be nice to find a man to be "Drunk in Love" with but until I find him or he finds me, I will continue to be drunk and in love with myself. Cheers to that!

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